Getting divorced with kids is one of the most difficult things that a couple can go through. Not only is it difficult for the people in the relationship, but it can be extremely damaging for the children if the parents don’t do things carefully. In order to avoid causing confusion it’s important to know what to do and, perhaps more importantly, what not to do.
Take a look at some of the biggest mistakes divorced parents make and what you can do to avoid them.
Using Their Children as a Weapon
Sometimes emotions can get extremely high during the divorce process, and it’s not uncommon for parents to want to hurt the other. In many cases, the child is a parent’s weak point, so in an attempt to hurt the other parent, one of the people in the relationship used the child as a weapon.
However, your child should not be a part of your battle. Don’t use your child as a way to hurt the other parent, or you will ultimately wind up hurting your child. Keep things as polite as you can, even though it may be difficult. Unless you hope to create long-lasting damage and potentially cause your child to feel like the divorce was their fault, don’t involve them in your battles.
Talking Badly About the Other Parent
It’s natural to want to say a few bad things about your ex during a divorce, even if it was an amicable one. But, if you feel like letting off some steam about your ex-spouse, you should do it with anyone but your child. Bad-mouthing the other parent can lead your child to feel like they have to take sides. As the old saying goes, if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.
Dating Too Soon
Even though you may be in a hurry to meet someone new and start a new life, you should take your time. Rushing into things too quickly can be a big mistake for everyone involved. It can be difficult for your children to accept a new relationship prematurely, and it can lead to hurting the other person in the relationship since you may not actually be ready to move on. Take your time before diving into anything, and you’ll thank yourself later for it.
Don’t Post About It On Social Media
Even though you may love using social media as a place to express how you’re feeling and what you’re doing, it’s not appropriate to air your dirty laundry. Don’t post about your divorce or rant about your ex unless you want it to be held against you. Not only can it cause a rift between you and your ex, but they may even be able to use it against you in court. You’re better erring on the side of caution.